My Baby is 129 Days Old

Stranger to a friend of mine: Awww how old is your baby?
Me: internally starts to panic because I can’t remember how old my baby is and I know the question is coming to me next. I start doing math in my head, at risk of internal combustion.
Friend: He’s [insert number of weeks old here]
Stranger: Awww! [turns to me] And how old is your little guy?
Me: Uhhhh… 3 1/2 months, oops, I mean 3 months, shit! 4 months. How many weeks does that work out to?
Stranger: …
Friend: ….

Later that day:
Me to hubby: How many weeks old is Little Man?
Hubby: I don’t know, why don’t you count?
Me: Yes! Okay!
Me a few minutes later using my fingers and calendar: Is the first week 1 or does it start at 0? Never mind! It doesn’t matter.

Another day:
Stranger: Aww, how many weeks old is your baby?
Me: Shit.

Version 2
Don’t eat the leaves!!

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